My Favorite Chuck Norris facts:-)

[] Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

[] It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself.

[] When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.

[] We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.

[] Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.

[] Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills people.

[] The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Chuck Norris in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.

[] Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Taco Bell. They made him one.

[] Chunk Norris doesn't wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.

[] When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. The water gets Chuck Norris.

[] What is going through the minds of Chuck Norris's victims just before they die?
Chuck Norris's shoes!